Archive | November, 2012

Inappropriate Texts and Other Isht

28 Nov

I’m wondering how in the hell do you handle an inappropriate sexual jokes via text from a guy you actually like. I know some of you may had the same situation when guys ask for photos? We all know what happened to phone sex guy, Mr. Worst Date Ever, and Hey Sexy Dude but maybe I could have handled those differently and been less dismissive…well not for worst date ever guy. One the one hand I have personal boundaries and respect that a new guy has violated by sending such a thing which is a red flag to me but on the other I ┬álike this new guy and think he’s funny and don’t want to be too uptight. How do I let him know he’s gone too far without totally cutting him down?

Here are my responses I might consider:

1.) Ignore it and dismiss this dude. #redflag

2.) Ignore it and tell him I didn’t get it if he asks.

3.) Oblige, laugh it off and hope he doesn’t do it again and when he does then cut him off. #passive aggressive #hellno

4.) Communicate to him that he’s a perv and I don’t do pervs.

5.) Through him off and say something like, “Yo mama!”. #deflect

6.) Pretend it didn’t bother me but keep it in me mind to bring up next time he does something similar. Nahhh

7.) Lecture him about his misogynistic ways and hopes he apologizes and will realize what a total jerk he is and does everything in his power to prove me otherwise.

8.) Send him one back…nah too soon

9.) Simply replying LOL and SMH. This way he knows I’m laughing with him but disapproving at the same time.

10.) Well, I guess I could tell him that it made me uncomfortable and that I’m old-fashioned and don’t like to receive messages like that until I get to know him better.


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30 B4 30

1 Nov

So I have about 11.5 months before the big 3-0. I am kinda excited. I feel that I have spent so much of my 20s lost in this world and I cannot wait for this ish to be over. Bad finances, poor decisions, self-loathing, rigid self constructs, confusing therapy sessions, family issues, lack of gratitude, lack of consciousness, poor self image, laziness, lack of discipline, unworthy men, lack of loyalty in friendships, bad friends….the list goes on. I have learned so much from my 20s and kicked ass in many ways but I cannot wait for the the next chapter where I plan to actually slow down and enjoy life and implement what I’ve learned. I am so grateful for my life and health but I know that there is SO much more to come that is going to blow my mind. In the meantime and in between time I want to come up with 30 things I’ve either always wanted to do or should do before 30. I did a lot in my 20s but a lot was left untouched. I don’t have it all figured out but I figure this will be a working living list before October 2013. Here is what’s on the agenda so far:

1. Pay off my credit card debt

2. Fall in love again

3. To visit a caribbean island or to get another passport stamp

4. Make amends with Steven S.

5. Start my business by having at least one business client

6. Go to Mardi Gras or Carnival

7. Visit Moiyattu in Ghana- ok this is getting unrealistic

8. Get another raise

9. Take spanish class at CC

10.Take swim lessions

11. Take a road trip

12. Bake my mom’s pound cake from scratch

13. Get a fun piercing

14. Teach/Host another dance class

15. Accept or change my body


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